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“ Of what a strange nature is knowledge ! It clings to the mind when it has once seized on it like a lichen on the rock . I wished sometimes to shake off all thought and feeling , but I learned that there was but one means to overcome the sensation of pain , and that was death — a state which I feared yet did not understand . I admired virtue and good feelings and loved the gentle manners and amiable qualities of my cottagers , but I was shut out from intercourse with them , except through means which I obtained by stealth , when I was unseen and unknown , and which rather increased than satisfied the desire I had of becoming one among my fellows . The gentle words of Agatha and the animated smiles of the charming Arabian were not for me . The mild exhortations of the old man and the lively conversation of the loved Felix were not for me . Miserable , unhappy wretch ! “ Other lessons were impressed upon me even more deeply . I heard of the difference of sexes , and the birth and growth of children , how the father doted on the smiles of the infant , and the lively sallies of the older child , how all the life and cares of the mother were wrapped up in the precious charge , how the mind of youth expanded and gained knowledge , of brother , sister , and all the various relationships which bind one human being to another in mutual bonds . “ But where were my friends and relations ? No father had watched my infant days , no mother had blessed me with smiles and caresses ; or if they had , all my past life was now a blot , a blind vacancy in which I distinguished nothing . From my earliest remembrance I had been as I then was in height and proportion . I had never yet seen a being resembling me or who claimed any intercourse with me . What was I ? The question again recurred , to be answered only with groans . “ I will soon explain to what these feelings tended , but allow me now to return to the cottagers , whose story excited in me such various feelings of indignation , delight , and wonder , but which all terminated in additional love and reverence for my protectors ( for so I loved , in an innocent , half - painful self - deceit , to call them ) . ” Chapter 14 “ Some time elapsed before I learned the history of my friends . It was one which could not fail to impress itself deeply on my mind , unfolding as it did a number of circumstances , each interesting and wonderful to one so utterly inexperienced as I was . “ The name of the old man was De Lacey . He was descended from a good family in France , where he had lived for many years in affluence , respected by his superiors and beloved by his equals . His son was bred in the service of his country , and Agatha had ranked with ladies of the highest distinction . A few months before my arrival they had lived in a large and luxurious city called Paris , surrounded by friends and possessed of every enjoyment which virtue , refinement of intellect , or taste , accompanied by a moderate fortune , could afford .
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