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VI . Pig and Pepper While Alice was looking at the house , a footman came running out of the wood . A footman is a servant in uniform who opens doors and carries messages . This footman had the face of a fish . He banged on the door , and another footman opened it . This one had a round face and big eyes , like a frog . The Fish - Footman handed him an enormous letter . “ For the Duchess , ” he said . “ The Queen invites her to play croquet . ” Then they both bowed so low that their curly wigs got caught together . Alice laughed so much that she had to hide in the wood . When she came back , the Frog - Footman was sitting on the ground by the door . From inside the house came a terrible noise of shouting , sneezing and breaking plates . “ Nobody will hear you knock , ” the Footman told her . “ I’m going to sit here until tomorrow . ” So Alice opened the door herself . It led straight into a big kitchen full of smoke . The Duchess sat in the middle on a three - legged stool , holding a baby . A cook was stirring a huge pot of soup over the fire . The air was full of pepper . The Duchess sneezed , and the baby sneezed and screamed without stopping . Only the cook and a big cat did not sneeze . The cat sat by the fire with a grin that went from ear to ear . “ Please , why does your cat grin like that ? ” asked Alice shyly . “ It’s a Cheshire cat , ” said the Duchess . “ That’s why . Pig ! ” Alice jumped , but the Duchess was speaking to the baby , not to her . Suddenly the cook started throwing pans and plates at the Duchess and the baby . The Duchess paid no attention . “ Oh , please be careful ! ” cried Alice . “ That pan nearly took the baby’s nose off ! ” “ If everybody minded their own business , ” growled the Duchess , “ the world would go round much faster . ” “ That wouldn’t be a good thing , ” said Alice . She was pleased to show what she knew . “ The days and nights would be shorter . The earth takes twenty - four hours to turn round on its axis , you see . . . ” “ Talking of axes , ” said the Duchess , “ chop off her head ! ” She heard the word “ axis ” ( the line the earth turns round ) as “ axes ” , the tools for chopping wood . Then the Duchess began to sing the baby a very odd lullaby , a song to help a baby sleep . It said that you must be hard on a little boy who sneezes , because he only does it to annoy you . At the end of every line , she shook the baby hard . “ Here ! You can hold it for a while , if you like , ” said the Duchess suddenly , and she threw the baby to Alice . “ I have to get ready for the Queen’s croquet game . ” And she rushed out .
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