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Chapter 3 When I had attained the age of seventeen my parents resolved that I should become a student at the university of Ingolstadt . I had hitherto attended the schools of Geneva , but my father thought it necessary for the completion of my education that I should be made acquainted with other customs than those of my native country . My departure was therefore fixed at an early date , but before the day resolved upon could arrive , the first misfortune of my life occurred — an omen , as it were , of my future misery . Elizabeth had caught the scarlet fever ; her illness was severe , and she was in the greatest danger . During her illness many arguments had been urged to persuade my mother to refrain from attending upon her . She had at first yielded to our entreaties , but when she heard that the life of her favourite was menaced , she could no longer control her anxiety . She attended her sickbed ; her watchful attentions triumphed over the malignity of the distemper — Elizabeth was saved , but the consequences of this imprudence were fatal to her preserver . On the third day my mother sickened ; her fever was accompanied by the most alarming symptoms , and the looks of her medical attendants prognosticated the worst event . On her deathbed the fortitude and benignity of this best of women did not desert her . She joined the hands of Elizabeth and myself . “ My children , ” she said , “ my firmest hopes of future happiness were placed on the prospect of your union . This expectation will now be the consolation of your father . Elizabeth , my love , you must supply my place to my younger children . Alas ! I regret that I am taken from you ; and , happy and beloved as I have been , is it not hard to quit you all ? But these are not thoughts befitting me ; I will endeavour to resign myself cheerfully to death and will indulge a hope of meeting you in another world . ” She died calmly , and her countenance expressed affection even in death . I need not describe the feelings of those whose dearest ties are rent by that most irreparable evil , the void that presents itself to the soul , and the despair that is exhibited on the countenance . It is so long before the mind can persuade itself that she whom we saw every day and whose very existence appeared a part of our own can have departed for ever — that the brightness of a beloved eye can have been extinguished and the sound of a voice so familiar and dear to the ear can be hushed , never more to be heard . These are the reflections of the first days ; but when the lapse of time proves the reality of the evil , then the actual bitterness of grief commences . Yet from whom has not that rude hand rent away some dear connection ? And why should I describe a sorrow which all have felt , and must feel ? The time at length arrives when grief is rather an indulgence than a necessity ; and the smile that plays upon the lips , although it may be deemed a sacrilege , is not banished . My mother was dead , but we had still duties which we ought to perform ; we must continue our course with the rest and learn to think ourselves fortunate whilst one remains whom the spoiler has not seized .
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