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By nine in the evening , the inaugural address still sounded like a committee report . The ideas were sound . The sentences were not . Dr Chen stood at the end of the conference table while three editors worked through the latest draft for the opening ceremony of a new civic institute . The speech needed to sound formal without becoming ceremonial , ambitious without becoming vague , and memorable without becoming theatrical . Its main problem was structural . The speaker had important points , but they arrived in mismatched grammatical shapes . One paragraph read : " We will strengthen local partnerships , improving public access , and our research will become more transparent . " Marta circled the sentence . " Three promises , " she said , " but only one of them is built like the others . " The first item used will plus a base verb : " will strengthen . " The second used a participle : " improving . " The third introduced a new subject and finite clause : " our research will become . " None was ungrammatical by itself , but together they lacked parallelism . She rewrote it : " We will strengthen local partnerships , expand public access , and make our research more transparent . " Now the three coordinated elements shared the same syntactic frame : we will + verb + object The improvement was not merely decorative . Parallelism tells listeners which ideas belong together . In speech , where there is no opportunity to reread a complex sentence , repeated structure becomes a map . Oleg , the speechwriter , was unconvinced . " Isn't that too polished ? " " Only if every sentence does it , " Dr Chen replied . " Parallelism is strongest when it gives order to an important sequence . If everything marches , nothing feels important . " That distinction became the principle of the revision . They moved to the opening paragraph . The original draft said : " Tonight we begin a new chapter . We are here to listen to our city . We also want to learn from its institutions . The institute should serve people who have rarely had access to research . " Farah read it aloud . " The ideas are related , but the rhythm doesn't reveal that . " She proposed : " We are here to listen , to learn , and to serve . " The sentence was shorter , but it carried more force because each infinitive occupied the same position . The listeners could anticipate the pattern after the second item and hear the third as completion . Dr Chen added a second sentence : " To listen without assuming , to learn without retreating , and to serve without speaking for those we claim to represent . " This version was more complex . It used parallel infinitive clauses , each followed by a without - phrase . The repetition established symmetry while the differences carried meaning . Oleg nodded . " That feels like a speech . " " Because the grammar is helping the argument , " Farah said . They turned to the next section , which listed the institute's commitments . The first draft read : " We will publish our findings openly . Our partnerships should be long - term . We want students from every district to feel welcome . Accountability must guide our decisions . " The content was clear , but the rhetorical relationship among the claims was weak . Were they examples ? Principles ? Promises ? Marta reorganised them :
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